FRIDAY, Apr 21 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR FRIDAY, April 21, 2023
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

KINDERGARTEN DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“It’s Kindergarten Day. The first day at Kindergarten is a memorable, exciting, nervous, and anxious time for mother and child. Most children and mothers will never forget the first day at Kindergarten. Hopefully, it was a good experience for all! Kindergarten Day is celebrated in honor of Friedrich Froebel. He was born on this day in 1782. In 1837, he started the first Kindergarten in Germany. It became popular quickly. Kindergartens were originally a 1/2 day to get children acclimated into learning, social interaction, and school, in a fun, yet educational manner. Kindergarten has evolved in most areas into a full time program. This is partly the result of increasing pressures on education, and partly due to the increase in working mothers in America. Celebrate today with a trip down memory lane. Pull out the old pictures of you and/or your child’s first day at Kindergarten.”

NATIONAL CHOCOLATE COVERED CASHEWS TRUFFLE DAY

NATIONAL SURPRISE DRUG TEST DAY – Don’t say we didn’t warn you!

SAN JACINTO DAY
Celebrating the Battle of San Jacinto on April 21, 1836. It was the final battle of the Texas Revolution whereby Texas won its independence from Mexico. It is an official holiday in the State of Texas.

SCHOOL LIBRARIAN DAY

April is:

Car Care Month
Celebrate Diversity Month
D.E.A.R Drop Everything and Read Month
International Guitar Month
Jazz Appreciation Month
Keep America Beautiful Month
National Card and Letter Writing Month
National Garden Month
National Greyhound Adoption Month
National Humor Month
National Poetry Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

FRANK OCEAN’S COACHELLA ICE RINK FIASCO

This story is, oddly, true. Reclusive singer Frank Ocean was the headline draw at the Coachella music festival last weekend. He ended up angering the crowd when, first, starting an hour late. The energy was low; he and the band were obscured by a bunch of people walking in a circle around the stage; a random DJ set was dropped into the the middle, leading many fans to think his performance was over. Ocean sat down for most of his performance. And then he ended the set, early, blaming a noise curfew. But now, this: Ocean was supposed to have ice skaters perform during his set, on actual ice, outdoors in the desert. He hired over 100 local hockey skaters, and they rehearsed for several weeks. The skaters were bussed out to the festival. But right before show time, Ocean decided to cancel the skating show. The ice rink had to be melted down before he could perform on a quickly re-designed stage, which is why there was the hour-long delay. The people walking in circles around him were the ice skaters. Afterwards, they were all left to sit in hot tents, they couldn’t even get into the festival.
* Even Spinal Tap said, “This is dumb.”
* He started an hour late? Stop whining – that’s only a third of how late Madonna starts her shows.
* This could have gone completely the other way if he had let the audience play on the ice.
* It’s now known as the Ice Capade Escapade: The iceberg in Frank Ocean.
* Next time, it’s just gonna be two kids on skateboards.
[NOTE: Someone probably showed him the Rick Wakeman video. Another true fact: In 1975, keyboardist Rick Wakeman performed his new progressive rock album “The Myths and Legends of King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table” with an ice show – skating King Arthur, skating Gwenevere, skating knights wearing those goofy skating-horsey costumes —– cringe levels were off the scales. And the music sucked. (video here: youtube(dot)(com)/watch?v=VO3KAqsqjaY)

BUZZFEED NEWS SHUTTING DOWN

The BuzzFeed News website is shutting down. Oh no. Anyway…. the company’s CEO and co-founder Jonah Peretti said the move was part of a 15% workforce reduction. Peretti said he had overinvested in BuzzFeed News “because I love their work and mission so much.” Moving forward, BuzzFeed will publish their news through HuffPost, which BuzzFeed acquired in 2020 and which Peretti said “is profitable.”
* Now where will the Kardashians’ public relations firm publish their daily made-up press releases? Oh, right – everywhere else.
* Such a shame. So close to that Pulitzer Prize.
* Here’s what the world is losing, folks. These are actual headlines from Thursday 4/20 Buzzfeed News site:
– “Why Barbie’s Best Friend Midge Was Once Removed From Shelves”
– “Help, The World Is On Fire And I Feel Like My Life Is Over At 24”
– “Le Creuset’s New Color Is The Trend Child Of Millennial Pink And Alison Roman’s Shallot Pasta”
– “After These People Tried Erotic Hypnosis, They Couldn’t Recognize Themselves”
– “Travis Barker’s Ex-Wife Shanna Moakler Dragged Kourtney Kardashian After Her Son Said She ‘Filled The Empty Spot’ In His Heart And It Looks Like Things Are Getting Seriously Messy”

JEFF BEZOS BUYS HELIPAD BOAT BECAUSE HIS NEW YACHT DIDN’T HAVE ONE

Jeff Bezos recently took ownership of a brand new $500 million, 417-foot-long yacht. Well, the new yacht has everything… except a helipad. And Bezos’ girlfriend Lauren Sanchez is an avid helicopter pilot. What did he do? Bezos bought a $75 million, 279-foot support yacht with a helipad, for his girlfriend, to travel along with the new superyacht. Besides the helipad, It can comfortably accommodate 45 people, and can carry a host of toys, including water scooters, sea bobs, and even a submarine.
* Can’t you just, you know, tie the submarine to the back of the main boat and drag it along?
* This is like how his orbital spaceship has no bathroom. Isn’t anybody double-checking these blueprints?
* A boat for your helicopter is like a Tough Shed in your backyard for your rider mower. Yes, it’s exactly like that.
* This message from Jeff: If you’re driving an Amazon delivery truck listening to my show, turn it off and get to the next house.

THE BUZZ

COOKING SURVEY

According to a survey of those infamous 2,000 Americans, here are the Top Meals Americans Can Make Without A Recipe:
1. Eggs over easy
2. Scrambled eggs
3. Hard boiled eggs
4. Poached eggs
5. French toast
6. Soup
7. Grilled cheese
8. Pasta
9. Rice
10. Salad
11. Toast
12. Beans
13. Pancakes
14. Roasted chicken
15. Mashed potatoes
16. Bacon
17. Grilled vegetables
18. Tacos
19. Mac and cheese
20. Grilled steak
* Hello? Hot dog. Hello? Bowl of cereal. Hello? Red Baron pizza. Hello? Microwave popcorn. Should I keep going?
* You realize, or course, that for most of those foods, the instructions are right in the name: “Mashed…potatoes – ok, take potatoes and do what with them? Oh – MASH them. OK.”
* Further proof that McDonald’s will never go out of business.

Also, here is a list of Intimidating Kitchen Tools:
1. Spatula
2. Measuring cups
3. Whisk
4. Food processor
5. Measuring spoons
6. Air fryer
7. Deep fryer
8. Pressure cooker
9. Immersion blender
10. Pasta maker
* Measuring cups and measuring spoons. I swear if you pull them out and put them on the counter, I am leaving!
* It’s not easy to find the 2,000 stupidest people in America but, by golly, I believe this survey has done it.
* How are you more intimidated by a whisk than a food processor?

U.S. NEWS

MAN MISTAKENLY RAMS INTO CAR THAT WAS NOT HIS EX-GIRLFRIEND’S

A 59-year-old Lincoln, Nebraska, man is in jail after he repeatedly crashed into a woman’s car early Wednesday morning, mistaking the woman for his ex-girlfriend. The incident began just after 1 a.m. Daryl Stokebrand rear-ended the sedan, then used his SUV to push the woman’s car. He then pulled up beside her and sideswiped her before stopping in front of her. Mr. Stokebrand got out of his SUV, approached the woman and immediately realized she was not who he thought she was. He apologized and offered to pay for the damage, and then left the scene. He caused $6,000 in damage to the woman’s car. He was arrested on several charges.
* Honest mistake. How many cars can there be on the road at 1 a.m. Wednesday morning in Lincoln, Nebraska? Seven?
* “Crashing into her car? No, your honor, those were love taps.”
* Yeah, I think we know who brought on the break-up.
* This could be the starting point for a spinoff show: “My Crazy Ex-Boyfriend.”
* As punishment, the judge should order him to tell this story to every woman he dates.

COUPLE BANNED FROM CRUISE LINE FOR FISHING OFF THEIR BALCONY

Carnival Cruise Line banned two passengers after a video showing them fishing over the side of their stateroom balcony went viral on social media. A spokesperson did not specify where, when or on what ship the incident took place. A video shows a passenger pulling the fish up on a line from the turquoise waters stories below the balcony. A representative for Carnival says, “Fishing from our ships is prohibited. We have identified the guests and they will not be cruising on Carnival again.”
* Some people have all the luck.
* How dare you have fun without paying the $150 fishing excursion fee.
* No fish on the menu?
* Cruise ships offer amusement rides, musical theater, gambling, dance lessons, and yet the one thing boats were invented for – fishing – you can’t do.
* It’s nice to see a story about a cruise ship that doesn’t involve a stomach virus.

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

MASSIVE GOLD THEFT AT TORONTO AIRPORT

An air cargo container carrying more than $15 million ($20 million Canadian) in gold and other valuables disappeared from Toronto’s Pearson International Airport Monday. The container, 5 or 6 square feet in size, arrived on a plane early Monday evening. Investigators are not saying where the plane arrived from, or where it was heading. Officials say the plane was unloaded according to normal procedure and its cargo taken to an airport holding facility, where it later disappeared.
* Anyone check on Danny Ocean and his crew lately?
* Or Pussy Galore and her Flying Circus?
* Could have been worse. Could have been a crate of Canadian maple syrup.

WOMAN, SON DITCH PLANE IN OCEAN, SWIM TO SHORE

A woman pilot ditched her plane into the sea, and she and her son then swam to shore. Michelle Yeats was flying back to Perth, Australia with her 15-year-old son Jake after viewing the solar eclipse in Western Australia’s north when the plane’s engine cut out at about 5 p.m. She sent a mayday and made a snap decision to try for a water landing. Yeats, a commercial pilot, said she had trained for such a landing “many, many times,” but did not ever expect to have to do it for real. The plane came down about 30-50 yards off Leightons Beach. People on the beach swam out to help them get back to shore. Neither Yeats nor her son suffered any injuries. The plane quickly sunk below the surface.
* Pretty cool mom, right?
* They survived a plane crash, had to swim in the ocean full of sharks and stonefish and blue-ring octopuses, back to the land full of brown snakes, crocodiles, giant spiders, toxic trees and rugby players. Not today, Australia!
* I would have gone down with the plane.
* I bet next time, they remember to fill the tank.
* Other than that, how was the eclipse?

TRENDING

SOMEONE JIGGERED THE TRIGGER OF THE “RUST” GUN

The prop vintage gun used in Alec Baldwin’s “Rust” shooting that left one filmmaker dead and another wounded had recently been fixed with a new trigger, which made misfire possible, according to a report. The dummy Colt 45 revolver used on the New Mexico set of the Western movie had recently gotten a new trigger added, which sources said could have impacted the weapon’s ability to misfire, sources told the Los Angeles Times. Baldwin had long said he did not pull the weapon’s trigger. Of course, this doesn’t explain why there was live ammunition in the gun.

JENNIFER COOLIDGE TO GET MTV MOVIE COMEDY AWARD

MTV announced Thursday that Jennifer Coolidge, 61, will receive the Comedic Genius Award at the awards show in May. Coolidge is known for such films as American Pie, Legally Blonde and Best in Show. She also played Tanya McQuoid in the first two seasons of the HBO series The White Lotus. Past recipients include Melissa McCarthy, Sacha Baron Cohen, Kevin Hart, Will Ferrell and Jack Black.

“RUST” CHARGES AGAINST ALEC BALDWIN TO BE DROPPED

The criminal charges filed against Alec Baldwin for the fatal 2021 “Rust” shooting will be dropped, according to sources. The prosecutors are expected to file the paperwork soon, Deadline reported on Thursday. In doing so, involuntary manslaughter claims against Baldwin will be dismissed. However, the charges against Baldwin’s co-defendant and the film’s armorer, Hannah Gutierrez-Reed, have yet to be cleared.

WEIRD CELEBRITY BABY NAMES

Time to catch up on the strange names celebrities give to their babies:
– Ed Sheeran and wife Cherry Seaborn welcomed the first daughter, Lyra Antarctica, in 2020.
– “High School Musical” alum Ashley Tisdale and her musician husband, Christopher French, are parents to a little girl named Jupiter, who was born in 2021.
– Cameron Diaz and Benji Madden have a daughter named Raddix Chloe Wildflower.
– Rapper Eve and her husband, Maximillion Cooper, welcomed a son named Wilde Wolfe Fife Alexander Somers Cooper.
– Maroon 5 frontman Adam Levine and model Behati Prinsloo’s daughters are named Dusty Rose (born in 2016) and Geo Grace (2018).
– George Lucas and wife Mellody Hobson named one of their children, a daughter born in 2013, Everest Hobson.
– Celebrity chef Jamie Oliver and his wife, Juliette Norton, have five children: Poppy Honey Rosie (born in 2002), Daisy Boo Pamela (2003), Petal Blossom Rainbow (2009), Buddy Bear Maurice (2010) and River Rocket (2016).
– Scarlett Johansson and Colin Jost named their son Cosmo in 2021.
– Rappers Cardi B and Offset share Kulture, born in 2018, and Wave, born in 2021.

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

May 14, Sunday – Mother’s Day
May 29, Monday – Memorial Day
June 14, Wednesday – Flag Day
June 18, Sunday – Father’s Day
June 21, Wednesday – Summer begins (The June solstice occurs at 10:58 a.m. EDT)

BIRTHDAYS

James McAvoy (actor, “His Dark Materials,” “Glass,” “Split,” younger Professor Charles Xavier in “X-Men” movies) … 44
Nicole Sullivan (comedian, actress, “black-ish,” “The King of Queens”) … 53
Rob Riggle (comedian, actor, co-host of Holey Moley) … 53
Andie MacDowell (actress, “Groundhog Day”) … 65
Tony Danza (actor, “Who’s The Boss?,” “Taxi”) … 72

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“Don’t try too hard to be young. Be who you are.”

(A) Clint Eastwood
(B) Dame Judi Dench
(C) Tony Danza

ANSWER: (C) Tony Danza

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

1986 – A vault in Chicago’s Lexington Hotel that was linked to Al Capone was opened during a live TV special hosted by Geraldo Rivera. Except for a few bottles and a sign, the vault was empty.
* Like Geraldo’s credibility.

1983 – Former First Lady Betty Ford admitted she was addicted to alcohol and prescription drugs.
* Her brave admission led to the establishment of the Betty Ford Clinic, which turned out to be a great way for her to meet celebrities.

1980 – Rosie Ruiz was the first woman to cross the finish line at the Boston Marathon, but she was disqualified when officials discovered she had jumped into the race about a mile from the finish.
* I’ll bet she cut in front in the line at the supermarket, too.

1972 – Apollo 16 astronauts John Young and Charles Duke drove the “million dollar electric moonbuggy,” or Lunar Rover, on the surface of the Moon.
* Of course, as soon as they drove it out of the dealership, it was only worth $750,000.

1879 – The first firehouse pole from the sleeping quarters to the trucks was installed at Engine Company #21 in New York.
* If you’re going to risk your life, the adventure should at least start out with a little fun.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2016 – Prince was found dead at his home in Minnesota at the age of 57, by EMT’s who had been summoned and found his body in an elevator. On June 2, the Midwest Medical Examiner’s office stated that the musician had died of an accidental overdose of fentanyl.

2015 – Phil Rudd, former drummer of AC/DC, changed his plea to guilty on a charge of a threat to kill, in a court in Tauranga, New Zealand. The court heard Rudd was unhappy about his album’s launch party and asked for a former employee to be “taken out.” He also pleaded guilty to cannabis and methamphetamine possession. He was sentenced to eight months’ home detention.

2014 – Robin Thicke’s controversial hit single Blurred Lines was named the UK’s most-downloaded song of all time. The song had sold 1.54 million copies since it was released in May 2013, despite criticisms of its explicit lyrics. About 20 university student unions banned the track, saying it promoted “date rape culture,” an accusation Thicke consistently denied.

2001 – R.E.M. guitarist Peter Buck was charged by police at Heathrow airport with being drunk on an aircraft and assaulting British Airways crew. Buck was taken into custody after landing on a flight from Seattle and questioned by police for 12 hours.

1993 – Former Rolling Stone Bill Wyman married for the third time when he tied the knot with 33-year-old fashion designer Suzanne Accosta.

1990 – Singer Amy Grant sued Marvel Comics for including her likeness in a Dr. Strange Comic.

1990 – Sinead O’Connor started a four-week stay at No.1 in the U.S. singles chart with her version of the Prince song “Nothing Compares To You.” The track was also a No.1 hit in 18 other countries.

1984 – Phil Collins started a three-week run at No.1 in the U.S. singles chart with the theme from “Against All Odds.” It was his first U.S. No.1.

1984 – The soundtrack to “Footloose” went to No.1 on the U.S. album chart.

1982 – The Clash’s Joe Strummer disappeared for three weeks, causing a tour cancellation. He was found living rough in Paris.

1973 – Tony Orlando & Dawn started a four-week run at No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “Tie A Yellow Ribbon Round The Old Oak Tree.”

1956 – Elvis Presley had his first number one hit, as “Heartbreak Hotel” made it to the top of the Billboard charts.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. The average age of THESE is 11.4 years. What are they?
Cars on U.S. roads

2. Around 50% of people say THIS has happened to their car. What is it?
A bird pooped on it shortly after they had it washed

3. Over half of people who have THIS on their car, don’t use it. What is it?
A sunroof

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