WEDNESDAY, Apr 20 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR WEDNESDAY, April 20, 2022
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: A & M AUTOLAND – Dollar Days; THE ONLY MORNING SHOW IN TOWN

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

LIMA BEAN RESPECT DAY

LOOK ALIKE DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“Oh Boy! It’s Look Alike Day. Time to look like somebody else … copycat. Today’s a day to find someone you really look up to, and try to look like them. Start with the hair. Cut and style your hair, as needed, to look like the person you’ve selected to look like. Then, select items from your wardrobe (or buy some new clothes!) that your lookalike wears. Along the way, make sure to practice and copy their walk, their talk, and their facial expressions. In other words. try to be as identical to that person as possible. Who should you look like? Anyone you want. Its as simple as that. Pick an actor or actress, a singer, a politician, family member or friend. Look alike contests and parties are a great idea for today.”

NATIONAL PINEAPPLE UPSIDE-DOWN CAKE DAY

NATIONAL POT SMOKERS DAY / 4/20 / WEED DAY / NATIONAL WEED DAY

VOLUNTEER RECOGNITION DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“Volunteer Recognition Day honors the legions of volunteers who dedicate themselves to causes and helping others. They are making big and small differences in the lives of millions of people all over the world. They are saving lives. They are improving lives and providing comfort. They assist people, animals, and nature. Most volunteers do not ask for recognition. They just want to help and to ‘give back’ where they can. In documenting special and unique days, this author attempts to avoid editorializing, and keeps to reporting the facts. But, I will step away from the norm when speaking to this topic. It is vital and essential that more people get involved. There are so many groups and causes that need volunteer efforts. And, the needs are so broad and urgent, that everyone can find someplace to volunteer and make a difference. Celebrate this Volunteer Recognition Day by: Thanking volunteers for their work; getting involved yourself in a volunteer activity; donating to a volunteer group.”

April is:

Car Care Month
Celebrate Diversity Month
D.E.A.R Drop Everything and Read Month
International Guitar Month
Jazz Appreciation Month
Keep America Beautiful Month
National Card and Letter Writing Month
National Garden Month
National Greyhound Adoption Month
National Humor Month
National Poetry Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

BEN AFFLECK AND MATT DAMON TO MAKE TWO HOUR SNEAKER COMMERCIAL

Ben Affleck and Matt Damon are reuniting for another film. The two will write, produce, direct and star in the yet-to-be-named film. This time it’s the true-life story of former Nike executive Sonny Vaccarro. Damon will portray Vaccarro while Affleck plays Nike co-founder Phil Knight in a story around Nike’s effort to sign basketball player Michael Jordan to its shoe company in the mid-eighties, an endorsement that seemed impossible at the time but thanks to the maverick sneaker salesmen, would become the most significant relationship between an athletic brand and an athlete.
* I can’t think of a more compelling subject for a movie than selling shoes.
* The movie will be in extremely limited release, and even if you can find it playing somewhere it’s gonna cost, like $800 a ticket.
* Spoiler: In the pivotal scene, Michael Jordan sits looking at the contract holding a pen just above the line where he would sign. Finally, Affleck and Damon can’t stand it anymore and scream “JUST DO IT!!!”
* The sequel will be a story of how Nike got Hollywood to make a two hour commercial for them.
* They were going to make a movie about getting Shaquille O’Neal to endorse tons of products, but that movie would run for seven hours.

THE BUZZ

SCOTS VOTED THE WORLD’S BEST LOVERS

According to a survey from a travel insurance company called Loveit Coverit, Scotsmen are the world’s best lovers. World travelers were asked to rate the holiday flings they had in other countries on a scale of one to ten. The top ten:
1. Scotland
2. Italy
3. France
4. England
5. Spain
6. America
7. Portugal
8. Ireland
9. Sweden
10. Wales
* Whales? They went inter-species?
* Scotsmen know how to hug. It’s all that practice with the bagpipes.
* Best lovers, and yet Scotland was nowhere near the top of yesterday’s list of penis sizes by country, so that’s a relief. Er, to some of you out there.
* Just curious … is there any OTHER reason people go to Scotland?

U.S. NEWS

CONVENIENCE STORE MISTAKENLY SELLS GAS FOR 45 CENTS PER GALLON

A mistake by a convenience store owner in Tennessee led to him selling gas for 45 cents a gallon, and nobody told him for five hours. Only one customer, Mr. Henry DeHart of Chattanooga, knew something was wrong when, after putting 12 gallons of premium gas in the tank of his car, he was charged $5.64, when the price of gas in the state was around $4.50. Mr. DeHart went inside to explain the situation to the gas station owner, who started poking at his screen and then turned green (* luckily he didn’t also triple in size and become a raging Hulk). Nobody had told him in the last 5 hours. Gas station owners make a slim profit on gasoline sales, usually about 10 to 15 cents on the gallon. He was on the verge of tears, said Mr. DeHart, who did the right thing and paid what he should have owed.
* And then he bought a gallon of milk in the store, which almost made up for all the money the store owner had lost that day.
* It was tricky leaving the gas station what with all the drivers in line trying to run him over.
* There goes the money for the bathroom upgrades this year.
* Time for the gas station owner to go back to the old-timey mechanical cash register.

DRIVER HANDS COP BAG OF METH DURING TRAFFIC STOP

Officers with the Bridgeport, West Virginia Police Department were conducting a traffic stop on a vehicle for improper registration last Saturday night. As officers spoke with the vehicle’s driver, Roy Porter, 57, he handed them a packet that officers thought was the registration of the vehicle, however, a small plastic bag fell out, officers said. Inside the bag: 4 grams of meth. A passenger in the vehicle had 220 grams of meth, officers said. Both men were arrested.
* For speeding, no doubt.
* That’s when the officers asked, “Sir, do you know how stupid you were going?”
* Meth along with your registration. That’s, like, the worst bribe ever.
* Handing a cop your meth is actually a warning sign that you’re doing too much meth.
* Folks, before you destroy your brains with meth, figure out some hiding places in your car.

LOUISIANA CRAWFISH THIEF

A Louisiana man is accused of stealing sacks of crawfish from a private pond in the middle of the night. The owner of the pond, in Vacherie, Louisiana, reported last Friday that someone had stolen crawfish from his property during the night. Deputies patrolled the area and found a man trespassing at the pond the next night. He had filled three sacks with the critters. Theft of livestock can lead to a 10-year prison sentence and up to $5,000 in fines.
* Not a shrimpy penalty.
* He got pinched.
* Cops put the squeeze on him, and he cracked.
* Now HE’S in hot water.
* Boy, that evidence locker is gonna stink in about 12 hours.

MAN SETS RECORD FOR WORLD’S BIGGEST TONGUE CIRCUMFERENCE

A Michigan man was awarded a Guinness World Record for having the largest tongue circumference, officially measured at 4.8 inches. Dante Barnes of Battle Creek said he first realized his tongue might be unusual when he watched a video online of someone measuring their own tongue and decided to give it a try. His tongue circumference is roughly the same size as a ping pong ball. He said the muscle doesn’t give him any trouble during normal tasks. Barnes said he sees his tongue as a source of pride. He says, “I definitely see my tongue as a gift.”
* And his girlfriend agrees.
* It used to be normal size, and then he discovered Tootsie Pops and started bulking it up.
* He doesn’t even need a sponge when he washes his car.
* “Mr. Barnes, how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?” “One. Just one. SLURRRRP!!! Crunch.”
* Wait – how is there enough room left in his mouth for food?

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

ELECTRIC CHOPSTICKS INCREASE SENSE OF TASTING SALT

Japanese researchers have developed computerized chopsticks that enhance salty tastes, potentially helping those who need to reduce sodium in their diets. Developed by Meiji University professor Homei Miyashita, the chopsticks use a weak electrical current to transmit sodium ions from food, through the chopsticks, to the mouth where they create a sense of saltiness. “As a result, the salty taste enhances 1.5 times,” say Professor Miyashita. The average Japanese adult consumes about 10 grams of salt per day, double the amount recommended by the World Health Organization, so this would allow eaters to cut back on sodium intake without losing any flavor.
* And every time those things shock your tongue, it’s a real rush.
* Unfortunately, the enhanced experience of salt makes everything taste like beef jerky.
* I saw this on Shark Tank and they picked the guy up and literally threw him out of the studio.
* Can you use them for popcorn at the movies?

TRENDING

WORLD’S OLDEST DOG IS NAMED TOBYKEITH

TobyKeith the Chihuahua has been confirmed as the oldest living dog in the world, according to Guinness World Records. The little pup celebrated his 21st birthday on Jan. 9 and was officially recognized as the world’s oldest dog on March 16. TobyKeith’s owner is Gisela Shore in Greenacres, Florida. The average lifespan of a Chihuahua is 12 to 18 years, so Shore began to suspect TobyKeith may hold the record for the oldest dog in the world after his 20th birthday last year – a fact that was confirmed a year later. Shore claims the secret to Toby’s long life is regular exercise, healthy genetics, a diet of vegetables, rice and chicken and, of course, a loving home.

JOHNNY DEPP VS. AMBER HEARD TRIAL

Johnny Depp took the stand Tuesday in his defamation lawsuit against ex-wife Amber Heard. Highlights:
– Depp testified that he never struck Heard or any woman in his life. He said he felt the need to stand up against Heard’s claims because he felt responsible to stand up for his kids, who were hearing all the allegations about him.
– Depp testified that the beginning of his relationship with Heard was great and he thought she was “too good to be true.” Heard began a routine where, when Depp came home from filming on set, she’d take off his boots for him and hand him a glass of wine. But the cracks began to appear when that routine broke. One night when he came home from filming, Heard was busy speaking on the phone, so Depp took his boots off himself. When Heard noticed, she chastised him, saying, “That’s my job. That’s what I do. You don’t do that.” He says she was visibly shaken that he had broken her rules or routine.
– At that point, Depp said, things got worse. “Once you notice something like that, you notice other tidbits, and things come out,” Depp said. “And within a year, a year and a half, she had become another person, almost.”
– Depp apologized in court for foul language he used in text messages to Amber Heard. “I am ashamed of some of the references made,” Depp told the jury. “I’m embarrassed that at the time the heat of the moment, the heat of the pain that I was feeling went to dark places.”
Depp will be back on the witness stand today (Wednesday).

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

May 8, Sunday – Mother’s Day
May 30, Monday – Memorial Day
June 14, Tuesday – Flag Day
June 19, Sunday – Father’s Day
June 21, Tuesday – Summer begins (The June solstice occurs at 5:14 A.M. EDT)

BIRTHDAYS

Carlos Valdes (actor, Cisco/Vibe on “The Flash”) … 33
Carmen Electra (D-list actress) … 50
Wade Hayes (country singer) … 53
Andy Serkis (actor, motion capture actor) … 58
Jessica Lange (actress, “American Horror Story”) … 73
Ryan O’Neal (actor) … 81
George Takei (actor, LGBT advocate, Mr. Sulu on the original Star Trek) … 85

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“I’m more attracted to a stronger man rather than a feminine man. Someone who would just throw me down and take control. I love feeling helpless. I definitely like a man who is aggressive and confident.”

(A) Hillary Clinton
(B) Queen Elizabeth
(C) Carmen Electra

ANSWER: (C) Carmen Electra

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

COVID-19 in History:
2021 – A record number of new COVID-19 cases was reported (5.24 million) in one week around the world according to WHO, with a third in India.
2020 – The last three cruise ships still afloat amid the Covid pandemic finally docked at the ports of Marseille, France; Barcelona, Spain; and Los Angeles, California.

2010 – An explosion on the Deepwater Horizon oil platform, leased by British Petroleum, killed 11 workers and began spewing an estimated 200 million gallons of crude into the Gulf of Mexico for nearly three months.
* On the anniversary of the start of the Revolutionary War? Is Britain still angry over that?

NOTED BUT NOT FIT FOR HUMOR
1999 – The Columbine High School massacre occurred in Littleton, Colorado (next to Denver) when two students opened fire killing twelve classmates, a teacher, and themselves; twenty-six others were wounded in the attack.

1990 – Pete Rose pleaded guilty to hiding $300,000 in income.
* It was a cup of casino chips in his locker.

1987 – A Japanese expedition reached the North Pole by motorcycle.
* Although we have no idea why.

1887 – The first ever car race was held in Paris. Only one competitor entered.
* Well, at least you could run back to the concession stand without worrying about missing anything.

1879 – The first mobile home, a horse drawn hut, was used in a journey from London to Cyprus.
* And then it was hit by a tornado.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2020 – Stuck at home in lockdown during the coronavirus pandemic, Willie Nelson staged the “Come And Toke It” live stream (in reference to 4/20 day, “the unofficial weed holiday”) to support efforts to legalize marijuana and free those incarcerated for it. Guests included Ziggy Marley, Kacey Musgraves, Billy Ray Cyrus and Toby Keith.

2002 – In the dispute over who owned the rights to Nirvana’s recordings, Dave Grohl and Kirst Novoselic asked a Seattle Court to prove that Courtney Love was mentally stable. They told the court that Love was “irrational, mercurial, self-centered, unmanageable, inconsistent and unpredictable.” They also claimed a contract was invalid because Love was “stoned” when she signed it. Eventually Love remained the primary beneficiary of the publishing rights to Kurt Cobain’s estate, which included more than 98 percent of the publishing rights to Nirvana’s music.

1996 – Pop superstar Madonna announced that she was pregnant by her personal trainer, Carlos Leon.

1990 – Janet Jackson received a star on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame at the start of “Janet Jackson week” in Los Angeles.

1987 – This week in 1987, the disco-rollerskating Broadway musical “Starlight Express” broke the box-office record set by “The King and I” when it set a record earning $606,081.

1981 – John Phillips of The Mamas and the Papas received a five-year jail sentence after pleading guilty to drug possession charges; the sentence was suspended after 30 days. Phillips started touring the U.S. lecturing against the dangers of taking drugs.

1961 – The FCC granted FM radio stations the right to begin broadcasting in stereo – that decision led to the “underground” radio movement, which in turn spawned commercial FM radio.

1959 – Country music legend Dolly Parton released her first single, “Puppy Love.”

1957 – Elvis Presley started an eight-week run at No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “All Shook Up,” which was the year’s biggest single, selling over 2 million copies.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. A recent survey revealed that a whopping 70% of women say men over the age of 35 look pretty ridiculous when they do THIS. What is it?
Wear their hats backwards

2. The vast majority of women say they’re not interested in dating a man with THIS physical characteristic. What is it?
A man who weighs less than she does

3. According to a recent survey, 65% of women say it’s a real turnoff when a guy does THIS. What is it?
Winks at them

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