TWITTER ROLLS OUT “FLEETS”

Twitter on Tuesday rolled out a new function called Fleets, which allows users to publish temporary tweets, which will then go away in a short amount of time – just 24 hours. (* I got ten bucks that says they won’t.) Similar features have long been a staple on Instagram, Facebook and Snapchat. Fleets were announced in a tweet from the company, who said, “That thing you didn’t Tweet but wanted to but didn’t but got so close but then were like nah. We have a place for that now — Fleets!”
* Written like only a 40-year-old trying to sound like a 15-year-old can.
* So now you can pester and distract people with stuff that isn’t going to matter one day from now.
* It’s called a Fleet, like the enema, because you’re gonna dump them quick.
* And as we all know, anything you don’t want on the internet always goes away forever.
* Can you turn old tweets into fleets retroactively and make them going away? I’m thinking of one account in particular.
* I got one word for your “temporary” tweets. Screenshot.