STUDY: WESTERN-STYLE DIET MAKES YOU STUPID

A study from Macquarie University in Australia says a “Western-style” diet makes you stupid. Even if you’re slim and healthy, eating a high-fat, high-sugar diet for just a week was found to impact brain function and make it harder for people to control their appetites. Past research had shown that a “Western-style” diet – generally defined as a diet high in fat, sugar and processed foods – impaired brain function in animals. Researchers suspected the same would happen in humans, so they recruited 110 lean and healthy adults ages 20 to 23, all of whom were self-described healthy eaters. (* Liars.) Half of the group ate their normal diets for a week. The other half ate a “Western-style” diet heavy on waffles and fast food. Those on the “Western-style” diet performed worse on memory tests than the healthy-eating group and also had “measurable weakening of appetitive control.”
* What’s more, those on the “Western-style” diet performed worse on memory tests, pass the donuts.
* I’m sorry, but you’d have to be an idiot to ever pass up free waffles.
* It’s about time we had a definitive study on how bad fast food is for you.
* A “Western-style” dumbing-down diet. You know, the kind eaten by the inventors of computers, interplanetary spacecraft, nuclear energy, vaccines, the internet, MRI scans, cellphones …
* Hold on, I’m trying to do a search of Australian inventions … just a minute … there must be something …