BEWARE THE GIMP

A man in a gimp suit (“Pulp Fiction”? Anyone? Bueller?) is terrorizing the village of Claverham in Somerset, England. Somebody in a “full black rubbery” gimp suit has been stalking the neighborhood, charging at lone individuals late at night. A woman in her 20s who managed to take a picture of the rubber-clad offender before fending him off at around 11:30 pm last Thursday. She said, “He kept coming towards me and was touching his groin, grunting and breathing heavy.” The week before last, the same man is believed to have chased a young man. Police say they have received 14 reports of a man approaching people while wearing various disguises, “one of which was a black body suit.”
* Worst supervillain ever.
* But still not caught. He’s Claverham’s Clever Ham.
* Could it be Chuck Rhoades from “Billions”?
* If you’re in a gimp suit, aren’t you supposed to be chained to something?
* The cops want to collar him. He wants them to dog-collar him.
* As long as he’s gone this far, why not add an Evil Clown mask?