YOUR DAD, SCULPTED IN CHEESE, FOR FATHER’S DAY

Kraft is auctioning off the perfect Father’s Day gift for the dad who has everything – a custom cheese sculpture of his head. The auction, which ended Tuesday afternoon (* Great timing on that promotion, Kraft!), will give the top five bidders the opportunity to submit photos of their dads to be transformed into cheese sculptures “by bona fide cheese artists.” The company came up with the contest because, they say, “your old man’s cheesy greatness should be celebrated.” The company warns that your cheese dad should not be eaten. All proceeds from the auction are being donated to Feeding America, a hunger-relief organization.
(example here: https://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2018/06/12/Kraft-auctioning-cheese-sculptures-of-cheesy-dads-for-Fathers-Day/9471528807983/)
* So fight hunger in America by holding a contest that turns large amounts of cheese into a sculpture you can’t eat.
* This idea alone has just made me lactose-intolerant.
* Cheese doesn’t really fit my Dad’s personality. How about an ice sculpture made from frozen bourbon?
* What kid sits in school and dreams, “When I grow up, I wanna be a bona fide cheese artist.”
* The only bona fide cheese artist I know of is Josh Groban.