15 QUARTS OF PENNZOIL IN HIS PANTS

A man wearing baggy blue jeans managed to stuff 15 quart-sized bottles of Pennzoil motor oil and 30 DVDs down his pants before walking out of a 7-Eleven store in Lakeland, Florida, last week. Unfortunately for the thief, a Polk County Sheriff detective happened to be parked outside and saw the whole thing happen. After walking out of the store, the man walked past the detective, who was sitting in an unmarked vehicle outside the 7-Eleven. The detective confronted William Jason Hall, 38, and told him to remove all of the items from his pants. Surveillance video recorded Hall as he pulled 30 DVDs and 15 bottles of motor oil from his pants.
* Slick move.
* It’s like they say: you have to get up pretty oily in the morning to put one over on the Polk County police.
* “Just remove the motor oil, sir. I don’t need to see the dipstick.”
* Baggy blue jeans, ’cause trying this wearing yoga pants would have been even stupider.
* Kudos to that eagle-eyed 7-Eleven clerk for not noticing a guy with 15 quarts of motor oil in his pants.
* 15 quarts of motor oil? Dude needs to get his carburetors tuned up.