12 TONS OF SEIZED BEAVER PENISES

Chinese customs officers seized over 12 tons of illegally trafficked beaver genitals in the country’s biggest-ever smuggling case involving animal parts. A total of 94 bags holding thousands of beaver penises each were seized onboard a Canadian ship. Approximately 400,000 to 600,000 beavers were killed to produce the 12.7 tons of penises. Beaver penises are used in traditional Chinese medicine to cure erectile dysfunction and increase sexual vigor. The customs agency estimates the seized penises would have been worth more than $24 million.
* To us. To the beavers, they would have been worth so very much more.
* “Beaver penises cure erectile dysfunction and increase sexual vigor”? I would have thought rabbit penises.
* 12 tons. That is a lot of beaver penises. Dam.
* How do beaver penises taste, I wonder? They say it’s, uh, woody.
* Beaver penises. Oxymoron?