WOMAN DOUSES FLASHER WITH GARDEN HOSE

Nancy Eilen of Oakhurst, Georgia, was watering her garden on Tuesday morning when a man drove up asking for directions. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, Eilen said. He started calling to her, and she came closer. During the conversation, he leaned his seat back. “He had ‘it’ out and was ‘handling’ it,” Eilen said. “Unfortunately for him I was watering the plants, so I sprayed him. He sped off.” She reported the encounter to police. Eilen was nonchalant about the encounter when speaking to a reporter. “I was not as shocked and appalled as he thought I’d be,” she said. “I’m 55. I’ve seen a lot. He’s just lucky I wasn’t pruning,” Eilen added.
* Nice close, Eilen. Always end on a strong line.
* The guy needed a cold shower, and she gave him one.
* So her hose was a lot longer than his.
* He wanted directions and had it out? You mean his road map?
* “Hey, sweetie, can you help me get to Paradise?”
* “I was not as shocked and appalled as he thought I’d be”? Of course not. We’ve all been worn down from this campaign.
* The worst part was the man was also sexting while he drove.
* At least he wasn’t dressed as a clown.