TEACHER MAULED BY REVENANT BEAR DURING FIELD TRIP

An assistant college professor was mauled by a bear while teaching a mountaineering course in the Alaska Panhandle Monday. Forest Wagner, 35, of Fairbanks, was with a group of 12 University of Alaska Southeast students on Mount Emmerich when he was attacked. A student hiked down the mountain to get cell reception and call for help. Wagner was removed from the mountain via helicopter, and put on another LifeMed helicopter for the trip to an Anchorage hospital, where he was in stable condition. None of the students were harmed. Wagner was leading a Mountaineering 101 class. He teaches rock and ice climbing, backcountry navigation, glacier travel and mountaineering.
* Yay, Tuesday’s pop quiz is cancelled!
* “The Revenant 2: Revenge of the Great- Great- Great- Grandkid-bears.”
* Those who can’t do, teach.
* He nearly met a grisly end.
* Backcountry navigation? How about backcountry survival?
* Worst. Field. Trip. Ever.
* Do the students get a refund?
* “Is it too late to switch from Mountaineering to Accounting?”
* So it was Mountaineering 101 with an emphasis on life-saving techniques.
* I can just hear the bear saying, “That’s Mountaineering 101? Well, let me show you Grizzly Bear 101.”
* It’s weird how the bear went right for the teacher in charge.
* Maybe the bear had an unpleasant time in high school.