SUBWAY NOW PROMISES A FOOTLONG IS 12 INCHES

Subway sandwich shops is now promising its “Footlong” sandwiches will really be 12 inches long, after settling a federal lawsuit. Under terms of a deal approved by a Wisconsin federal judge, Subway agreed to institute a requirement that franchisees use a tool for measuring bread. The company has until May 30 to make sure all Subway stores are in compliance.
* It’s gonna take them ’til May 30th to buy a ruler?
* If only they had called them “Foot-ish.”
* At one point, Subway tried to argue that the sandwiches only had to be as long as the foot of the person making them.
* Next, the court plans to go after Buffalo wings.
* What’s the deal? Are they supposed to be from actual buffaloes? Are they all supposed to be from the city of Buffalo? Are we, the consumers, being buffaloed?
* And has anybody weighed a Quarter Pounder lately?
* They said it was an honest mistake, but you notice how these honest mistakes usually favor the business?
* It’s not like they said, “Uh oh. We’ve accidentally been giving the customers MORE than advertised.”
* So how long ’til the price increase to cover the extra inch and a half?
* I still think any Subway story that doesn’t mention Jared is a win for them.
* You tell me in the history of advertising when a spokesperson has done more damage than that?
* Ahh, the length of our sandwiches. After all those boring legal cases, it’s nice to see the courts used for something important.