SLAUGHTER YOUR OWN TURKEY: $150

For a complete Thanksgiving experience this year, why not slaughter your own turkey? Matt Wilkinson runs something called the “Pilgrim for a Day” class at the Hard Cider Homestead in Ringoes, New Jersey. Wilkinson, a 58-year-old turkey farmer, leads a handful of New Yorkers to the slaughter each year. The guests, typically aged 30 to 40, “want to get better connected to where their food comes from,” he says. Few expect what the process actually entails. Wilkinson helps students pick out their bird on his five-acre farm, then use a wire to hook it at the ankle and hold the back of its wings so it doesn’t wriggle out. He says, “When the bird realizes it’s going to be cooked up, it’s exceptionally strong. If those wings hit you, it can cause some serious damage.” And then (WARNING; GRAPHIC):
– The head of the turkey is pulled through the bottom of a cone as students wield a knife with a 3-inch blade to slice both arteries under the beak. Wilkinson says, “They feel the blood trickle down their forearms, they feel the heat of the bird inside its cavity to know its dead. I can’t emphasize how intense it is.”
– Then it’s onto the processing – the scalding 149-degree tank to loosen their feathers, then the plucking.
Wilkinson says no one’s ever chickened out – but one vomited afterward. He says his students are one-timers – he’s never had a repeat. He says, “We’re hugging at the end of the class. I can’t tell you how emotional this is. You’re taking them by the hand and guiding them through a discovery they weren’t sure they could do. They’re eternally grateful.”
The whole experience takes about two hours and costs at $50 a pop, excluding the cost of the bird, which can exceed $100.
* How much if you just want to, you know…watch? I’m asking for a friend.
* This Wilkinson guy really seems to get off on the whole thing.
* For an extra $30, he’ll have his pit bull bite the turkey’s head off.
* You can also take a picture to use as your Christmas card.
* “Few expect what the process actually ENTRAILS.”
* It wasn’t killing the turkey that made that one guy ill. It was the part where they all go in and make grandma’s pineapple Jell-O salad.