MAN WEARING "HOLD MY BEER" T-SHIRT CRASHES CAR

A man wearing a T-shirt that said “Hold My Beer And Watch This” has been arrested for driving under the influence after he crashed into a graveyard in Putnam, Connecticut. State police say 25-year-old Harrison Wootton crashed his car into a graveyard’s low stone wall in early Monday. Wootton was charged with driving under the influence of alcohol or drugs, failing to drive in the proper lane and misuse of plates.
* Also with “hurryin’ to his grave”, as my mother might say.
* The t-shirt asks you to “Hold My Beer” because obviously he can’t. Hold his beer.
* “Failing to drive in the proper lane”? Yeah, I guess if you run into a graveyard wall you’re not in the proper lane.
* The police stick everybody who runs off the road with that one, just to be mean.
* I like how it says, “alcohol or drugs.” They don’t know yet exactly – they just know he was wasted on something.
* Based on the t-shirt I suspect alcohol was a factor.
* It sounds like a bad episode of that “Street Outlaws” show.
* By the way … Memo to the dude on “Street Outlaws”: I know you think you look really cool when you run backwards and then turn on the flashlight to start the race, but you don’t. You look really dorky.
* And some day one of those cars is going to swerve and take your dorky ass out.