MAIL CARRIER CAUGHT DUMPING MAIL IN THE WOODS

The United States Postal Service has launched an investigation after residents in Decatur, Georgia reported seeing a postal worker dumping several bins of mail in the woods. Postal investigators recovered more than a dozen bins of dumped mail. Several citizens who live in the area told the local news station they’re upset because they haven’t received important mail. “You have business statements, bank statements, very important mail that people are looking for and probably waiting for,” said Kellie Campbell, who took video of the dumper.
* Like she was really waiting for that Pottery Barn catalog.
* Think of all the political campaign flyers these poor people have missed!
* Maybe the mailman was just setting the paper free back into its original habitat.
* The trees were horrified. “What have they done to you!”
* “Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from … ahh, screw it.”
* You’ve heard of the post office creed, right? Well, welcome to the slacker’s creed.
* “If it doesn’t involve a sofa, I’m not into it.”
* Ironically, the postal worker was cutting corners in the woods where there are no corners.
* The Postal Service has launched an investigation? I bet that’ll fly right along.