AUDIO: MAN URINATES ON JETBLUE PASSENGERS
An Oregon man is facing charges after he urinated on passengers on a flight from Anchorage to Portland, Oregon. 27-year-old Jeff Rubin was arrested early Friday after JetBlue Flight 47 arrived at Portland International Airport. Rubin had been sleeping for most of the flight. About 30 minutes before landing, he stood up and began urinating through the crack between the seats in front of him — onto the passengers sitting there. He then lost his balance and fell backward, spraying urine on passengers, seats and luggage. Rubin spent about five hours in jail. He faces charges of criminal mischief and offensive littering.
* Meteorologists call this the Jet Stream.
* So this guy does literally what the airlines have been doing figuratively to passengers for years.
* Something tells me this guy was flying on Ambien Airlines.
* Another piss-poor flight from JetBlue.
* Sounds like somebody’s been visiting the beverage cart.
* Gee, was he hammered when he got on the plane or did that happen later?
* He went on urinating even as he fell backwards? Wow, I don’t want to praise the guy, but that takes real talent.
* I tell you it was pretty bad. They said he looked like the Bellagio Fountains in Las Vegas.
CLIP: Our classic “Incontinental Airlines” parody spot.
