AUDIO: NEW YORK SUBWAY + BUGS + WORMS = CRAZY TIME
A woman hopped on the D train in New York City Wednesday night and began trying to sell live crickets and worms to the commuters. She was allegedly pushed by teenagers. Upset, the woman tossed her box into the air, sending worms and crickets flying across the car. People were screaming and trying to avoid the bugs when someone pulled the emergency brake. The train then stopped on the Manhattan Bridge and the air conditioner shut off, leaving passengers unable to escape the insects and the August heat. The woman then went berserk for half an hour as the crickets jumped on passengers, and urinated on the floor while everyone ran trying to avoid the piles of bugs. The train started to move again and pulled into the DeKalb Avenue station, where dozens of cops were waiting on the platform. Said Chris Calabrese, 29, who was on the train with his girlfriend, “She was banging on the doors and trying to climb out the windows. Everyone had crickets on their arms. My girlfriend was crying. Then some men were trying to hold her down and she started trying to throw up on them.”
* His girlfriend? That’s horrible. I’d dump her.
* This story bugs me.
* But I’ll bet the rats in the subway were delighted.
* Why did she do it? Because a New York subway car is the perfect place to sell fishing bait.
* At least I hope it was for bait.
* I guess it’s not easy to explain to a bunch of panicked New Yorkers that those things crawling all over them are, in fact, crickets and not cockroaches.
* I’m not understanding the part where she felt it necessary to pee on the floor.
* Actually, to be honest, I don’t understand any of the other parts, either.
* She should set up shop in Times Square. If the Naked Cowboy and Pervy Elmo can make it there, the Worm Woman should have no problem.
* Just another day in New York city.
* Get Samuel L. Jackson’s agent on the phone. We’ve got another winner here.
* You know the name, right? Bugs on a Subway.
* How about if the bugs mutate and a 100-foot cricket stalks Manhattan?
CLIP: This is a short piece of actual audio of the worm woman freaking out.
