BOX OF MISS AMERICA CROWNS STOLEN

Police in Mesa, Arizona, are searching for a man and woman who stole a package that contained dresses and a half dozen Miss America crowns. The package was stolen from the porch of a Mesa home. Officials with the Miss Phoenix, Miss Maricopa, and Miss Scottsdale Scholarship Pageants are now asking the thieves to return the stolen crowns, no questions asked.
* Not even, “Why do you need six crowns for three pageants?”
* Not even, “Do you believe the USA is still the greatest country in the world and why, you have 30 seconds?”
* Police say the crime followed a strange sequins of events.
* Maybe Elton needs them to go on tour.
* Oh come on. He had a movie called “Tantrums and Tiaras.” I think I’m safe here.
* My, how can they take this level of drama?
* By the way, have we thanked the pageant business for giving America Donald Trump?