MAN CHARGED IN MURDER, IMITATION OF 71-YEAR-OLD VICTIM

An Illinois man was charged Monday with the years-old unsolved murder of a 71-year-old woman. Thomas Spear, 43, not only killed Illa Venard in 1994, he allegedly disguised himself as the elderly victim on multiple occasions and forged her signature to cash checks. After the killing, Spear burglarized Venard’s apartment and took her checkbook along with her personal identification, according to officials. On several occasions, Spear disguised himself as an elderly woman, forged Venard’s signature and cashed four checks from her account.
* Great – the Dame Edna of murderers.
* I thought Norman Bates already had this territory covered.
* Those must have been some keen-eyed bank tellers, I tell you what.
* “Why, Grandma, what big beard stubble you have!”
* Neighbors became suspicious when Illa stopped smelling like talcum powder and lavender.
* Now here’s Aerosmith with “Dude Looks Like an Old Lady.”