GUY WALKS TO HOSPITAL WITH KNIFE IN HIS HEART

A New York man was stabbed in the heart, and managed to walk to a hospital with the knife in his chest. Police say 35-year-old Mohamed Ramirez was stabbed in the heart around 10 p.m. Monday night, and managed to walk five blocks to Elmhurst Hospital to check himself in. The injury was life-threatening. Ramirez – a former EMT – underwent emergency surgery. It’s unclear if he knew his attacker.
* Well, give him a book of mug shots and let him take a stab at it.
* It’s New York – you’re not gonna take a cab for five lousy blocks.
* The injury was life-threatening? Thanks for the prognosis, Dr. House.
* Look at the money his insurance company saved on diagnostic tests. “What’s your problem?” “I was stabbed in the heart, see?” “Yeah, OK.” Done.
* I was stabbed in the heart once, but that was by a high-school cheerleader.