TURKEY FALLS IN LOVE WITH A HONDA CIVIC

A Mt. Laurel, New Jersey woman says a “love struck turkey” has taken a liking to her son’s brand new Honda Civic and won’t let anyone else near the vehicle. Betty Ann DiGiacomo discovered a wild turkey wandering outside her home last Friday and she soon discovered the bird seemed enamored with her son’s brand new Honda Civic, which he bought two months ago. She named him Patrick (the turkey, not the Civic). DiGiacomo says Patrick won’t let anyone else approach the car. She says, “When I banged the pots and pans he came towards me. And I’ll be honest, I got a little scared and I ran in the house.” Experts said the turkey is displaying what’s known as “Crazy Jake Behavior,” which is named for adolescent male turkeys, or Jakes, who will often become attracted to shiny objects and will sometimes show an interest in their own reflections.
* Like Kanye.
* I suggest they put a big decal on the side of the car – a picture of a hatchet.
* Birds can fall in love with an object? So you’re telling me turkeys can have Asperger’s syndrome?
* Excuse me … I forgot to use the technical term: Crazy Jake Behavior.
* Wild turkeys can get Crazy Jake Behavior, and humans can too, by drinking too much Wild Turkey.
* Maybe the turkey can makes friends with one of those swans who love a paddleboat.
* Sometimes I think we should just put a net over the entire planet.
* Didn’t a flock of wild turkeys swarm over a postal truck recently? We better watch these birds. That’s all I’m sayin’.
* Who knows? Maybe that was true love too.
* Thanks, Betty Ann DiGiacomo. I hope we can call on you again when we have another really, really, really slow news day.