TEEN TASES COP FOR BUCKET LIST
Police in Newark, Ohio, helped a teenage leukemia patient cross off a bucket-list item: She wanted to use a stun gun on someone. Sixteen-year-old Alyssa Elkins got the idea after seeing video of her uncle, a state trooper, being hit with a Taser during his training. On Sunday, after some training from Newark police (* Step 1: point taser. Step 2: pull trigger.), she zapped Sgt. Doug Bline, who fell onto a mat, guided by spotters. He says being hit with a Taser is an unpleasant experience but it was worth it to help fulfill Alyssa’s wish.
* … despite the recurring facial tics and ringing in the ears.
* “Before I die, I want to hurt somebody.”
* It’s a nice thing to do and all, but if I had been that cop, I would have faked it.
* “(Bzzzzz) Whoa! Hey, you really got me, Alyssa! Whew. Wow, what a tingle. Ha ha.”
* What if she had wanted to club a guy with a night stick?
* At least she didn’t ask to hand out speeding tickets.
* Let’s be fair: The kid didn’t want to tase a cop. He just wanted to tase somebody.
* At least he didn’t pick a random stranger.
* I’ve always wondered if you could use a stun gun to cook hot dogs?
* “Anyone want another hot dog? They’ll be ready in 5 seconds. Literally 5 seconds.”
CLIP: Sometimes these granting-a-wish things go too far. Our classic “Fake-a Wish” parody spot.
