Police in Melbourne, Australia, were looking for an arson suspect who ended up pantsless after trying to burn a fast food outlet on Christmas Day. Two men were caught by a security camera pouring flammable liquid on the front of the restaurant. But after setting the liquid on fire, one of the men runs off with his pants on fire. Other security footage caught him peeling off the burning pants as he ran away bare-arsed, as they say.
* That’s what they call a hot streak.
* It was a half-assed attempt that left him fully assed.
* Christmas Day? Did he burn his Yule Log?
* Next time, use a flamethrower.

A thief tried to escape in a self-driving Waymo car after robbing a Los Angeles grocery store. The man had fled the store with the goods after pepper spraying a security guard. He then hopped into a driverless Waymo car, one of many that roam the streets of Southern California, turning it into a getaway car. However, the Waymos are programmed to pull over if they detect police lights and sirens, which were already swirling around the area. Cops caught up to the stopped vehicle about 3 miles from the scene of the crime and surrounded the car.
* What happened to you, Waymo? You used to be cool.
* It could be a movie: RoboCopCar!
* Catch Waymo crooks in a Waymo!
* Don’t let this happen to you, folks. Never pinch pennies when committing crimes. Pony up the money for a getaway driver.