A Scandinavian Airlines flight was forced to make an unexpected landing in Denmark when a mouse leaped from a passenger’s meal and began running around the cabin. The plane was flying from Oslo, Norway to Málaga, Spain when the mouse popped out of a food tray, spooking passengers. The pilot was forced to land in Copenhagen due to a policy that prohibits rodents on flights because they can chew through electrical wiring. A representative from the airline said, “This is something that happens extremely rarely.”
* At least it wasn’t a peanut – those things can set off an allergic reaction.
* Luckily, the mouse was too full of the chicken teriyaki to want to eat wiring.
* When a mouse tries to chew through electrical wiring, don’t you just get a cooked mouse?
* You just know the airline is thinking, “How can we pin this on Boeing?”
* At least they weren’t flying to a Disney park.

If you have a cat, you may think a modern self-cleaning litter box is the way to go. However, one popular design is not – it has been linked to more than a few cat deaths. The box was initially sold under the brand name Amztoy, but similar designs are sold under dozens of names across Amazon, Wayfair, and other outlets. Philip Bloom, who runs the “One Man Five Cats” webcast, bought one of these litter boxes to test it out himself, and it didn’t take him long to spot a fatal flaw. The unit has an inner box that, when in operation, mechanically rotates to loosen the litter inside. But as the box rotates, the inner box entry hole gets cut off by the outer box. Imagine an elevator with the doors open, suddenly moving to another floor – the opening works like a guillotine. The mechanism is strong enough to catch and crush a cat trying to escape while the unit is in motion. Many cat owners have contacted Bloom with stories of trapped and strangled and crushed kitties.
* Amztoy Litter Boxes, a division of DogCo.
* “Amztoy – One way or another, you won’t have to clean litter anymore.”
* Do the cats get eight chances before the ninth one gets them?
* I think the tables are finally starting to turn in the Cats vs. Humans War.
* We have a litter box of death, but it’s just a regular plastic tub. Our cat just has digestive issues.

A California couple driving east on the 91 Freeway in Riverside spotted a kitten stranded on the westbound side. The couple, both in their 20s, made a quick decision to rescue it. They took the next off-ramp and circled back, slowing to about 30 mph in the HOV lane with the car’s flashers on. The woman, who was driving, slammed on the brakes and stopped, pulling as far out of the carpool lane as she could. The man jumped out, took off his shirt and scooped up the kitten. But then a car coming up behind them didn’t brake in time and swerved into the center divider, heading right toward the man holding the cat. He jumped over the wall, losing the cat. The driver then swerved the other way, clipped the bumper of another car and careened across all lanes of the freeway, hitting a tractor-trailer. No one was seriously hurt, but one person was taken to a hospital for treatment of minor injuries. The semi drove off, apparently unaware it had been hit. The cat escaped alive.
* And on it’s little notepad, it crossed out “26” and wrote “29.”
* Not only do they try to kill us in our houses, now they’re getting us on our highways.
* Folks, don’t stop in the middle of a highway to catch a cat. Park on the side and shake a little bag of cat treats.
* To top it off, while the man was holding the kitten, it peed on his shirt.

A hunter was attacked by a brown bear, then accidentally shot himself while he was being mauled. It happened on Alaska’s Kenai Peninsula. Tyler Johnson, 32, was searching for bears with his father, Chris Johnson, an Alaska Wildlife Trooper, when they spooked the bear in thick brush. As Tyler was being tackled by the bear, he pulled out a pistol but shot himself in the thigh before firing seven more shots into the bear. His father, Chris, also fired shots at the bear, which ultimately died. Tyler suffered severe injuries from the attack to his right leg, as well as the gunshot. It took 90 minutes for a helicopter to arrive and airlift him to hospital. He is expected to recover.
* When asked how he was feeling, he said “Man, I’m shot.”
* So … how much experience did his dad have as a Wildlife Trooper? First week on the job?
* “You want to search for bears in thick brush, Tyler? Okay, no problem – let’s go!”
* Maybe next year they can just go hunting for antiques instead.

Vanessa Chaput was out jogging in her hometown of Haines Junction, in Canada’s Yukon territory, late at night with her German shepherd, Luna. She turned a corner and came face to face with three bears – a big male and two cubs. Her dog Luna took off after the two smaller bears, leaving Chaput alone with the male bear – which promptly charged at her. She says it took her head in its mouth and tossed her around. The bear finally backed off when it bit down on her hair clip, and the spring part exploded in his mouth. The bear finally retreated. She called 911 and had a 10-day hospital stay, where she received care for a broken arm, as well as upward of 30 stitches on her head, back, arm, and ear.
* All you joggers out there must be thinking: Where can I get some of those poorly-made hair clips?
* The three bears were cranky ’cause someone had been eating their porridge, sitting in their chairs, and sleeping in their beds.
* She’s lucky the bear didn’t bite down on the exploding hair clip and think, “Cool! Pop Rocks!”
* See? Jogging isn’t as good for you as people say.

Nantucket, Massachusetts, Airport Manager Noah Karberg was robbed in broad daylight by a seagull. While Karberg was loading groceries into his car, a seagull swooped down, landed in his shopping cart, and took off with his wallet. “It mugged me,” Karberg said. “It just grabbed my wallet and went.” He had put his wallet and keys into the top tray of the Stop & Shop cart. As he walked around the car to open the door to load the groceries, the gull struck. He chased the seagull across the Stop & Shop parking lot, over a fence, and onto the roof of the neighboring car wash. He watched as the bird pecked at the wallet. Some cash came out and flew away in the breeze. Despite the best efforts of the Nantucket Police Department, Karberg has not recovered his wallet, and the bird remains at large.
* The gulls aren’t talking. Not a stool pigeon among ’em.
* As the seagull flew away, it flipped him the bird.
* Keep your eyes open for a seagull pecking at the keys of an ATM machine.
* Hopefully there won’t suddenly be huge purchases of fish on his credit cards.

In Crestview, Florida, a woman was charged with animal cruelty after drowning her roommate’s pet jumping spider in ginger ale. Ilena Rasmusen allegedly took the $70 spider while the roommate was away from their shared home and killed it. The arrest report states that the roommate, after saying she could not find her pet spider, received a text from 43-year-old Rasmussen admitting to drowning the jumping spider in the ginger ale. For the record, jumping spiders are about as big as your fingernail. According to the internet, the diminutive jumping spiders have developed a reputation as a charming and curious pet. They are harmless to humans. They feed on other insects and spiders that are equal to or smaller in size.
* You can learn more about jumping spiders on, uh, the web.
* When is the “charming” part supposed to kick in?
* What kind of ginger ale was it, Canada Die?
* The sad part – the spider preferred tonic water.

A 19-year-old Oklahoma woman fought off a shark attack while swimming with her family in Galveston, Texas. Damiana Humphrey was on vacation with her family and swimming in waist-deep water when a shark – about four or five feet long – latched on to her hand. She started punching it. Damiana said the shark released its grip and swam away after she punched it, and she and her siblings quickly got out of the water. Damiana went to a local hospital where doctors operated on her hand. She suffered four severed tendons, and will take several weeks to heal. Galveston Beach Patrol Chief Peter Davis said he’s seen a few shark incidents and the ones he’s seen were shark bites, not attacks, where it’s a case of mistaken identity where they latched onto a human and swam away. Says Chief Davis, “It sounds like this may have been similar to that.”
* “But we won’t know until we actually talk to the shark.”
* No, honey, you weren’t ATTACKED, you were just BITTEN. Big difference.
* Good thing it didn’t latch on to her PUNCHING hand.
* Mistaken identity? Are we supposed to go swimming with a photo ID?

Approximately 100 wild chickens descended on Snettisham, England, a small inland town near the Norfolk coast. Residents said the birds wandered in from a nearby wood and have since unleashed “hell” – they’ve torn up gardens and residents are kept up at night by the endless clucking. Worse yet, some people have been feeding the chickens, and the food has attracted lots of rats. The town council is talking to specialists about what to do about the chickens.
* Yes: what to do, and what kind of seasoning to use.
* Seriously, a town-wide barbecue would clear this right up.
* Sure, they’re annoying, but aren’t the free eggs worth it?
* It’s like the funny version of the Hitchcock movie “The Birds.”
* They’ll just have to wing it.

A 26-year-old female veterinarian posted this story on Reddit: “A puppy arrived very sick, we did an X-ray, found something obstructing, did surgery, and it comes out to be a thong. We put it to the side. The woman owner eventually shows up. We explained what we found and then she says, ‘a thong?! I don’t have a thong! I never had thongs!’, and then called her husband screaming at him. Turns out he’s been cheating on her and it’s his secret mistress’s thong. That was my first day of my job.”
* Imagine the husband searching the house for the missing thong all this time.
* “Where’s that thong, doggone it?” “Yes.”
* The wife’s yelling at him on the phone while he’s trying to give her a thong and dance.
* “I can’t believe the dog got into that! I put it aside for your anniversary present!”
* Guess he’s … in the doghouse.