MCDONALD'S CHEESEBURGER ASSAULT

Police in Indianapolis, Indiana, were called to a McDonald’s around 12:30 a.m. Sunday after a woman assaulted her mother with a cheeseburger. The two women got in a fight after the mom told her daughter she could no longer stay at her home. The 60-year-old mom was driving her 39-year-old daughter to someone else’s house, but on the way, they stopped at a McDonald’s drive-thru. In the parking lot, the fight escalated and the daughter hit her mom in the left side of her face with her hand and the cheeseburger. The daughter got into another driver’s vehicle and fled the scene. Officers saw that mom had ketchup and mustard down the front of her shirt. Pickles, ketchup and mustard were splattered across the interior door of the car.
* Hmmm. What’s HER beef?
* “I’m not lovin’ it.”
* If they had stopped at White Castle, it would have been assault with a deadly weapon.
* Never kick someone out of the house when they’re “hangry”.
* How do you not want a lovely daughter like that staying in your house?
* Bet that daughter is fun to have around at a Fourth of July cookout.
* It could have been worse. She could have hit Mom with a Quarter-Pounder.
* Or a 300-degree Hot Apple Pie.
* Good luck getting that greasy cheeseburger smell out of the car.
* Fortunately Mom was able to clean up with some of the old wrappers lying on the car floor.
* Great, first the daughter has a failure to launch, and now she’s launching cheeseburgers.
* The Mom says it was close, but overall getting the daughter out of her life was still enough to make this a Happy Meal.