MAN TREADS WATER FOR 20 HOURS

A Florida fisherman is lucky to be alive after treading water for 20 hours. William Durden, 61, was fishing by himself on his boat, when he fell overboard last Wednesday on the Homosassa River north of Clearwater, Florida. He was not wearing a life jacket. Durden’s wife called authorities when he didn’t return home. He was found the next day and rescued by the Coast Guard. Durden, who said he was a former Navy pilot, had been treading water for 20 hours. He said making it through the night was “the hairiest part of the ordeal.” He got cold and started to shake, feeling “hypothermic.” When the sun came up he kept thinking “I’m gonna get picked up today.” After two hours he was spotted by a Coast Guard helicopter. A Coast Guard rescue swimmer jumped in, and was surprised to find Durden in good condition.
* He was suffering from “severe pruning”.
* Ex-Navy? Must have been a SEAL.
* No life jacket. Duh. Does he skip seat belts, too?
* Fell overboard? Okay. After how many beers?
* So the one that got away was him.
* Seriously, the local predators must really be ashamed of themselves right now.
* You’re telling me that they had 20 hours and they didn’t even get a nibble off the guy?
* Saying the man was lucky to be alive doesn’t show the right level of gratitude. I think we’re all lucky to be alive.
* Sorry to get heavy on you, but it’s Monday morning. I thought you needed the inspiration.
* “Homo’s Ass-a” River? That’s SO politically incorrect.