BANK ROBBER TAKES LOLLIPOP ON THE WAY OUT

Police in Florida arrested Jonathan Boston, 30, for bank robbery. He is accused of robbing at least three banks in the Palm Beach area. In one still photo from a surveillance camera, Boston is seen grabbing a complimentary lollipop from the candy bucket on the the way out after robbing the TD Bank in West Palm Beach. Police said the money was recovered. No word on the lollipop.
* He got outta there lickety-split.
* I think it’s nice that he didn’t steal the whole bucket.
* Isn’t it cute how there’s still a little bit of kid left in all of us?
* Now the bank is charging him interest for the time he had the money.
* I just realized one thing: I need a different bank.
* The only suckers at my bank are the customers.
* They say arresting this guy was like taking candy from a bank robber.
* You know why you rob banks in Palm Beach? Because that’s where the serious money is.
* The myth is Willie Sutton said that about banks in general but he never saw this kind of money.

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A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a deep coma and woke up after 6 months…

posted March 4

The woman asked the doctor about her baby. Doctor says, “You had twins, a boy and a girl. And your brother named them for you.” Woman says, “No, not my idiot brother! What did he name the girl?” Doctor says, “Denise.” Woman says, “Well, that’s a nice name. What did he name the boy?” Doctor says, “Denephew.”

What’s grey?

posted March 3

A melted penguin.

A cabbie picks up a nun.

posted March 2

After a few minutes, the cabbie says, “Sister, I have a question, but I don´t want to offend you.” The nun says, “I´ve heard just about everything. I promise you, nothing you say will offend me.” Cabbie says, “Alright… I´ve always had a fantasy to be kissed by a nun.” She says “Well… are you single?” He says, “Yes.” She says, “Are you Catholic?” He says, “Absolutely!” Nun says, “Pull into that alley.” He does, and she give him a kiss so passionate it could melt stained glass. As they drive away, the cabbie starts crying. The nun says, “My dear child, why are you crying?” He says “Forgive me, Sister… I´ve sinned. I lied. I´m married … and I´m Jewish.” The nun says “That´s okay. My name´s Dave and I´m on my way to a Halloween party.”