14-YEAR-OLD BOY TORCHES MOM'S CAR IN ROMAN CANDLE FIGHT

In Skyway, Washington, a 14-year-old boy took his mother’s SUV to go buy fireworks Tuesday morning with a couple friends (presumably, one of the friends drove). Boys being boys, they got into a Roman Candle fight. One of the boys accidentally shot a spark into the car and started a fire (presumably, the other fireworks they bought were still in the car). Mom’s car was soon engulfed in flames, and is now a charred wreck.
* And you should have seen the fireworks when the kid got home.
* There goes your college fund, kid.
* This kid is now grounded until he’s 40.
* PHONE TOPIC: “I did a big, bad thing.” Did you ever accidentally destroy something major?