GORILLA THROWS BLOCK OF WOOD AT ZOO VISITOR

A pregnant woman is recovering after she says a gorilla at New Orleans’ Audubon Zoo threw a block of wood into a crowd, hitting and injuring her. Sylvia Cressy says “Praline,” one of zoo’s two female gorillas, hurled the block of wood, striking her in the head. Cressy, who’s six months pregnant, says she fell on her stomach and spent hours being treated at two hospitals. Zoo officials describe the block of wood as an “enrichment tool” filled with honey and treats for the gorillas.
* The gorilla was immediately signed as quarterback for the Rams.
* Is this better than having a gorilla throw its feces at you? That’s a tough call.
* Couldn’t they make an enrichment tool out of, say, a sponge?
* That must be some pretty crappy honey and treats.
* How about trying a nice, soft bunch of bananas?
* Better yet, how about a trough of banana mush?
* If this woman gets the right lawyer, this whole incident could be an enrichment tool for her, too.
* You don’t think a jury would favor a pregnant woman?
* I know it’s inappropriate to say this now, but what a great promo for the new King Kong movie.
* Perhaps the gorilla was upset that they named it, “Praline.”
* The woman was treated at two hospitals? Wow, how big is this pregnancy?