CHRISTMAS

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1. I’d like everyone’s attention: Christmas is canceled. You can’t cancel a holiday. Keep it up, Stanley, and you’ll lose New Years. (The Office) :09

2. It’s Christmas break! It’s the time of year for peace and good will, dammit. (Bob’s Burgers) :03

3. Tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la la, la la Rock On! :05

4. The Simpsons Nutcracker. (Simpsons) :14

5. The Simpsons 12 Days of Christmas. (Simpsons) :35

6. Have a nice Christmas / Hava Nagila – for Hannakuh. (Simpsons) :08

7. OK, we’re rockin” around the Christmas tree. Any requests? Couples only, OK, this’ll get you dancing close. (Space Ghost) :09

8. Sometimes this holiday makes me feel like I’m a failure. Hey! You kiss Santa with that mouth? (Bob’s Burgers) :06

9. Come on, let’s go carol the crap out of this place. (Bob’s Burgers) :02

10. The Carol of the Fries [Ding! Fries are done] (Family Guy) :17

11. Mr. Burns releases the hounds on carolers. (Simpsons) :17

12. At least someone around here’s got the Christmas spirit. (Simpsons) :03

13. Ahhhh, shhhugarplum. (Bob’s Burgers) :01

14. Christmas is awesome. (The Office) :22

15. I have the feeling of Christmas! And the face of Halloween. (Sanford and Son) :04

16. William Shatner: “Dear Santa…” :27

17. Denis Leary’s thoughts on Christmas. :18

18. An Ed Grimley Christmas. (Martin Short) :12

19. Aw, man, I can’t believe they still haven’t figured out a way to detangle Christmas lights. (Simpsons) :04

20. Tangled up Christmas lights! We can take shifts untangling them (Futurama) :05

21. Ahh, bathtub eggnog. Just the way grandma used to drink. (Futurama) :03

22. Biggest day of the year deserves the biggest tree of the year. :13

23. That’s our Christmas tree? What, did you mug Charlie Brown? :04

24. Early Christmas shopping song. :13

25. I’m in a store, and I’m singing! Hey – there’s no singing at the North Pole. Yes there is! (Elf) :12

26. Hey, who wants to go to Megalomart and buy some tinsel? (King of the Hill) :04

27. Come on, Hank. Let’s go shoot us a Christmas tree. (King of the Hill) :03

28. Christmas isn’t all about getting stuff. Yes it is – take it back! Take it back!! (Bob’s Burgers) :04

29. Presents are the best way to show someone how much you care. (The Office) :11

30. Come on, it’s Christmas. What about Jesus, you think he cared about getting a bunch of gifts on his birthday? Rum-pa-pa-pum, that’s all he wanted. (Everybody Loves Raymond) :15

31. Stewie is excited to see mall Santa. (Family Guy) :15

32. Dad, look – Santa’s here! I want to sit on his lap. (Family Guy) :04

33. Naughty Stewie negotiates with Santa. (Family Guy) :14

34. I know it’s a little early for Christmas, Edward, but I have a present for you. (Edward Scissorhands) :13

35. Homer sings “Jingle Bell Rock” (Simpsons) :24

36. Christmas! Christmas, oh Christmas you Christmas you. C-h-i– no – C-h-r-i-s-t-m-a-s. (Bob’s Burgers) :16

37. We’ll go to Santa’s Village! Oh, I hate that place. It’s so crowded at Christmas. (Simpsons) :09

38. Welcome to Santa’s Village, where it’s Christmas every day. Closed on Christmas. (Simpsons) :04

39. I’ll go outside and make snow angels. (Simpsons) :02

40. Merry Christmas…Eve Day! (Bob’s Burgers) :04

41. Kids, I know it’s Christmas Eve, but I don’t think you pray to Santa. (Bob’s Burgers) :03

42. OK, time for bed, boys. Santa’s coming soon and he knows kids who stay up late are jerks. (Moral Orel) :05

43. Christmas Eve. The one night a kid wants to go to sleep, he can’t. (Simpsons) :06

44. Tonight you’ll be visited by three spirits. Oh – gin, vodka and tequila, I hope. (Great News) :05

45. And now, back to the joyous sounds of Christmas. :03

46. Ho ho d’oh! (Simpsons) :02

47. D’oh ho ho! (Simpsons) :02

48. Where is he? Where’s my Santa?? (Family Guy) :03

49. Three Stooges Christmas: Halt, who goes there? Santy Claus!

50. Ho ho ho. Santa, is that really you? How’d you get in? Through the window. (Family Guy) :11

51. Bring it on, Santa! (Futurama) :02

52. Christmas morning! Christmas morning! Presents presents presents presents!!! (Bob’s Burgers) :05

53. Merry Xmas everyone! (Futurama)

54. Merry Christmas, everyone. It’s showtime! (The Muppets)

55. Hi, guys and gals, welcome to our Christmas Jubilee of Stars. We’ve got a wonderful show planned for you, and we know you’re gonna have a rockin’ good time! (Alan Freed) :09