VALENTINE’S DAY

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1. Happy Valentine’s Day!!! [clang clang clang] (Family Guy) :04

2. You guys must be feeling pretty Valentiney now, huh? (Bob’s Burgers) :03

3. If this is your idea of being romantic, it’s not working on me. (Bob’s Burgers) :03

4. Hey! Who’s having a great Valentine’s Day? (Bob’s Burgers) :05

5. Whoa – why does it look like Valentine’s Day threw up in here? (Bob’s Burgers)

6. Happy Valentine’s Day. I didn’t get you anything. Me either. Wanna go make out? Yeah. (Bob’s Burgers) :05

7. Hello everyone, this is your captain speaking, and on behalf of myself and the flight deck we wanted to wish everyone a happy Valentine’s Day. (30 Rock)

8. This has been the best Valentine’s Day ever. :03

9. I guess some weirdo out there loves you. Happy Valentine’s Day. (30 Rock) :06

10. Valentine’s Day is a sham created by card companies to reinforce and exploit gender stereotypes. (30 Rock) :05

11. Happy Valentine’s Day no one. (30 Rock) :04

12. It’s so romantic, just like that movie I only saw the first ten minutes of…Fatal Attraction. (30 Rock) :06

13. Valentine’s Day was a massacre in Chicago where they shot everybody and put a curse on the Chicago Cubs. :07

14. The universe is cold and loveless. Uh-oh, bad Valentine’s Day? (Modern Family) :04

15. Happy Valentine’s Day (card exchange) Ohhhh… (Modern Family) :10

16. Happy Valentine’s Day…Lily. (Modern Family) :07

17. HappyValenbirthaversary! (Modern Family) :02

18. I love nothing! (Parks & Recreation) :02

19. Happy Valentine’s Day (Family Guy) :03

20. No, it’s a Monday, Valentine’s Day always falls on a Thursday. That’s Thanksgiving, Hoosierhead. :06

21. I got you all the cliche Valentine gifts. :49

22. Happy Valentine’s Day – oh, you have some dried blood on your teeth. :04

23. Valentine’s Day’s coming! Oh, crap, I forgot to get a girlfriend again. (American Dad) :05

24. Oh, a heart-shaped box of chocolates. That’ll fit right where my heart used to be. (American Dad) :05

25. To kissing! Come on, group kiss! I kiss Mia! I kiss Dan! Everybody’s kissing! You guys kiss! (American Dad) :07

26. Are you ready for your Valentine’s gift? No, but I’m ready for therapy. (Family Guy) :04

27. (SONG) – In other words…I love you. (Family Guy) :25

28. Oh, no it’s what? It’s Valentine’s Day again? (The Office) :05

29. Oh, look at that, Cupids and hearts. They’re really shoving our faces in it this year. (The Office) :07

30. I’m going to be Cupid, and I’m going to shoot my sparrow… funny little bird, but he gets the job done. (The Office) :14

31. Happy Valentine’s Day my loves! Everyone gets a smooch! (Bob’s Burgers) :06

32. Valentine’s Day song (Bob’s Burger’s) :18

33. It’s kissing time! (Powerpuff Girls) :05

34. I was in love once… in the bathroom at Kmart. I’m pretty sure that’s not love. Dammit! (Anchorman: Ron Burgundy)

35. You really want to know what love is? “Afternoon Delight” song. (Ron Burgundy)

36. I love you, Jack! (Titanic) :07

37. But in the end, isn’t that what Valentine’s Day is all about? (Futurama) :05

38. There you have it: young love, full of promise, full of hope, ignorant of reality. (Community) :04

39. That show makes me believe in love. And why not, Ken? (Most Extreme Elimination Challenge) :03

40. Ah! Cupid got me! That stupid fat, flying baby got me! I’m in love! Indeed you are, my friend, I recognize that look. Love hurts. (Most Extreme Elimination Challenge) :10

41. Roses are red / Violets are blue / Sorry I gave you / Herpes Type 2. (Most Extreme Elimination Challenge) :03

42. The important thing now is how you feel about her. It’s hard to say. Now when I think about her, I get all nervous in my stomach, like my bowels could cut loose at any moment. That’s love, dude. Wow, you’d think somebody would put that in a song. (Malcolm in the Middle) :15

43. Oh, it’s so wonderful to be in love, isn’t it, darling? Yeah, just don’t procreate. You never know what you’re going to get. (The Brak Show) :07

44. Love is a word that once spoken to a word cannot be retracted. Because they remember those things and marry you for it… What’s that mean, dad? It means, turn your house into cash. (The Brak Show) :30

45. Boys, this is it. I’m in love. With us? (Space Ghost) :04

46. Who wants to fall in love? (King of the Hill) :03

47. It’s Valentine’s Day. I’m alone. (Simpsons) :03

48. Sir, tomorrow is Valentine’s Day. Ah, yes, the day of the great Chicago massacre. (Simpsons) :08

49. Attention lovers of love! (Simpsons) :03

50. Woo hoo! I’ll woo her with woo-hoo. (Simpsons) :03

51. How was your Valentine’s Day? Very romantic. Homey had the basketball game muted the whole time. (Simpsons) :07

52. And that’s when I learned Cupid was just a fat naked jerk with an arrow. (Simpsons) :05

53. Shot down on Valentine’s Day. That’s supposed to be a gimme. Everybody’s gettin’ some but me. (Simpsons) :08

54. French it up, loverboy. I’m not a machine! (Simpsons) :04

55. Don’t forget it’s Valentine’s Day. What’cha gettin’ the missus? A heart-shaped box of chocolates. (Simpsons) :07

56. Happy Valentine’s Day. Oh, thank you, dear (smooch) Woo-hoo! (Simpsons) :06

57. It’s time to get Homer-erotic! (Simpsons) :03

58. Kids, it’s Valentine’s Day, so you know that that means – you get to stay downstairs watching tv with the sound turned way up…children…so naive. (Simpsons) :23

59. So you don’t want to kill me anymore? Only with kisses. Oh, don’t be a wuss. (Simpsons) :08

60. Kiss it and make it boogie! Kiss iiiit. (Simpsons) :03

61. Hello, it’s me, Lance Romance. (Simpsons) :04

62. Love conquers all! (Simpsons) :03

63. Love will keep us together (Song) (Simpsons) :37

64. Where do I begin…(Homer sings theme form ‘Love Story’) (Simpsons) :15

65. You have the right to remain sexy. Anything you touch can and will be held against you in a court of sex… (Simpsons)

66. Baby, I hope you’ve got snuggle insurance ’cause I’m about to file a claim. (Simpsons) :08

67. Mmmm, this is so romantic! Oh, my darling nothing is too romantic for you. Have some more liquor. Drink up, my pretty. (Simpsons) :15

68. Doin’ the Monster Mash on Valentine’s Day! You played the wrong record. (Simpsons) :25

69. But it’s St. Valentine’s Day! God wants us to do it. (Simpsons) :23

70. Bah! This is just another Hallmark holiday cooked up to sell cards. (Simpsons) :06

71. Happy love day everyone! (Simpsons) :03

72. This Valentine’s crap has gone too far. Edna won’t let me clap her erasers…etc. (Simpsons) :19