New Zealand has ordered 1,292 square feet of skin from the U.S. to help treat patients badly burned during the massive volcanic eruption on White Island. Every burn unit across the country is at full capacity. The 27 people hospitalized are suffering burns to at least 30 percent of their bodies. Dr. Peter Watson, chief medical officer of the Counties Manukau District Health Board, says they need the skin for temporary skin grafts. The average human body has about 11 to 21 square feet of skin surface area. Skin grafts come from donors after death, and only a thin layer is taken, like the skin that peels off with a sunburn. The skin is usually taken from a person’s back or the back of their legs.
* You don’t want skin from my back. It’s a zit minefield back there.
* 1,292 square feet of skin. You know what else is 1,292 square feet? The amount of paper that will be used to print out the lawsuits against the tour operators.
* Do they ship it in rolls, like wrapping paper?
* Darn. Now I’m hungry for potato skins.